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The Warrior with Blood on His Hands
Most of us know that there are stories of war in the Bible, but what does it say about the warriors? In this Sunday Special, we take a look at a specific warrior in God’s story and the impact of war on his life. We will address the tough topic of “What does it mean to have blood on your hands?” What does that say about you? Your marriage? When you are asked to be the good in the world, face evil, but to do so requires the willingness to take a life? Scripture actually addresses this and I’m excited to share with you what I’ve found.
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Forgiveness in Affair Recovery: God’s Design in Marriage
In this Sunday Special, we address the biggest faith question I get during affair recovery, which is how and when do I forgive? Of course this is a difficult question to answer depending on the damage that has been done. Join me as I walk with you through scripture that gives us a blueprint for forgiveness and hope for restoration. I address:
- God’s purpose and design for marriage
- How and why the enemy wants to destroy your marriage
- What Jesus says about when to forgive, and
- How we are not called to repeatedly forgive without boundaries
Sunday Specials on the Lifegiver Podcast are a chance for us to dive deeper into honest conversations regarding our faith and topics that come up in our marriage. In the last episode of the Lifegiver Podcast, I shared with you my strategy for affair recovery. If you haven’t heard that episode, listen to it here: https://www.podbean.com/eu/pb-5jwg4-b63b20
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Why Friendship Is Still Worth It
In this Sunday Special, I talk with Megan Brown, the If Gathering Military Outreach Communicator. Basically, that means she loves Jesus and loves to get people excited about Him.
I met Megan (officially) at the AFI Military Spouse of the Year Awards 2019, but I’ve been watching her for some time. Her personality is as colorful as she is! After hearing her lead a couple of morning devotionals, I knew I wanted to have her on the podcast.
In this episode, Megan shares the importance of friendship in this crazy military lifestyle as a “life or death” importance. Listen in as she shares how community and boundaries can breathe life into us from a biblical perspective.
Go here to find out more about If Gathering Military
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Where is God? A Conversation About God in the Dark Places
Welcome to another Sunday Special! I am so happy to bring back my good friend Sarah- you may remember her from episode two when we had a roundtable discussion. I wanted to bring Sarah back because she is not only funny, but I just love to listen to her talk!
In this episode, Sarah and I talk about what it is like to go through difficulty and feel like God is distant. Is He trying to teach me something? Is this happening because I did something wrong? It is so easy to try to rush through difficult circumstances and learn whatever you have to learn to end the struggle when what He really is trying to do is grow your character. Join us as we wrestle through this conversation of “Where is God in the Dark Places?”
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Ethan the Strong: A Story of Faith & Courage in the Midst of Loss
This is the second Sunday Special in Season 4 where we have honest conversations around faith in the midst of the service lifestyle. In this episode, I’m introducing you to Jim and Ashley, an Army chaplain couple, who recently went through one of the most difficult seasons of their life. Shortly after PCSing, Ashley found out she was having identical twins boys about the same time that their two-year-old son began to have seizures. Stretched thin with doctor’s appointments during an already busy season of being stationed at the Chaplain Schoolhouse, they soon found themselves in an overwhelming situation. Listen in as Ashley and Jim share how their faith was challenged as they fought for the lives of their sons. If you are going through a current season of loss, or have in the past, Jim and Ashley’s story will inspire you and encourage you as it has already done for hundreds of families who have watched them from afar.
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Sunday Special: Embrace Your Story
It’s time for the very first Lifegiver Sunday Special. I received feedback that some of you would like faith based content AND hearing from Matt- so this episode is the both of us giving a talk at our old stomping grounds where we first met- Gardner-Webb University. The sound on this one is a bit different because it was recorded in a different place and format, but I hope the message comes through in a way that will encourage your story.
Guess what- You can also WATCH this episode as well! Check it out here:
I hope that you enjoy this episode. I personally am huge fan of Matt Weathers, so I’m happy to share the stage with him anytime.
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Joy In Between
I have a great friend who every year thinks and prays about a word that she will focus on for the new year. It seems to have brought her great focus on the past years and I have been thinking a lot about doing it myself. For last two weeks I have thought about my last year. We moved to Augusta, Ga in December and I started working in January. I have been thinking about the ups and downs of being am military spouse and how the first year is often a time of excitement, adventure of a new place, and a rush to settle in. Our mission becomes settling the hearts of our children in new schools and friends, supporting our soldier as he finds his own connections at work, and deciding what we will do with ourselves. At home, it involves making it feel as such and finding our own circles. If you work, it is the anxiety of wondering if anyone wants to hire a military spouse, and then investing into your career- once again proving your worth to the local world who knows nothing of your past accomplishments. If you move as frequently as we do, year two is a bit tricky.
Year two is a time where we are settled in, making gains, and are… in between. There is no talk of where we are going, although we know it is inevitable. We have no choice but to continue to invest in the world around us, as if we are going no where. We naturally long to settle and have stability and so we tell ourselves that we are going no where. That’s always an option, right? Other military families get stuck, we could too, right? I don’t know about you, but my heart longs to do that, but my mind seems to anticipate change. So as I have thought about what word God would want me to focus on, He seemed to replay moments of the last year where I have used the word JOY. I have mentioned it in sessions with individuals and families, taught on it in marriage retreats, I even made a canvas to hang in my home during the holidays that shouted “JOY” in big bold sparkly letters. My soapbox on it has been that it means something other than happiness. People come into my office asking to be happy. I think happiness is fleeting. It is like opening presents on Christmas morning and is over in a moment. JOY is the lasting contentedness that follows that I think all of us are wanting. It comes from a place of connection and safety with others and the world around you, a sense of gratefulness for your Maker, and what follows is peace.
As I look into year two for me, I realize I have a lot more to learn about JOY. I desperately need it’s warm blanket to calm anxiety, settle vision, and keep me from over reaching. I have a tendency to do that. I claw at the future to grasp certainty when often times there is nothing there. But my present is, and that is where I need to be.
And so, JOY will be my word. In the midst of busy schedules, Cub Scout meetings, my own career including a teen outpatient program, and investing in my marriage, I will be learning about JOY. Here are a few things that I know bring me JOY:
- Thoughtful prayer with Jesus, not just a passing conversation. There are things I long to pray for that I keep putting aside for that quiet moment that I never find. I am convinced that my lack of focus stems from my inability to make this happen.
- Music- I put my guitar away when my step-father passed away. I believe I am ready to take it out again. I have a piano that was gifted to me, and my husband has begged me to sing around the boys again, so I believe I will. Worship frees my heart and unloads the weight of the world that I experience each day.
- Being content in myself. Actually working on the physical goals I have for myself and enjoying wherever I am in the process.
- Allowing myself to have more moments of happiness. They may be fleeting, but the JOY that comes from it flows into a grateful heart. Whether its playing a game with the family or basketball outside with the kids- it is far better than whatever is on the digital device in front of me. Having fun with my husband as well- we have worked so hard and this definitely doesn’t need to be forgotten.
- Creativity. For me, I have to contain this one. This year, I will be a good steward of what God provided and work on one project that will give me a sense of giving life to something. I am a lifegiver, and I know this is what God has gifted me to do. If I don’t hedge myself in, though, it can tend to get out of hand.
So, in the “in between”, my hope is that I will learn to be content there. “In between” can be a great place to be- not working towards anything, just being a good steward of what I have. Enjoying those I am blessed to be with and smiling more. JOY- in between. What word is on your heart?
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What is a Lifegiver?
You would think that this would be easy for me as I have been using the term “lifegiver” for years to describe the kind of person I want to become. Yet when it came time to work on this episode, not only did I have a loss for words- I also went through a challenging week that completely changed my perspective. The military has a way of taking everything you put nicely in an organized box in your mind and then dumping it out and walking on it. Or maybe that’s just me… I have a feeling you have been there, too. I admit that I am not especially strong at adapting to change quickly which you can imagine makes being a military wife tough. Yet, in that moment, I thought about all of you. I was reminded of how much grit it takes to be a military spouse, regardless of branch or circumstance. Some days are easy, others can feel excruciating- yet we find a way to push through and find a silver-lining. In this episode, I describe what a Lifegiver is and the three things that I have found in common with every Lifegiver I have ever met. If we want to make a difference in our home and in the world, these are three things we MUST do. I hope it challenges and encourages you to work towards your purpose and potential. She must know her current passion and calling. What is it you love to do? What fires you up and makes you angry with the world? A Lifegiver must define or begin to define what she is currently passionate about and then be working towards her future purpose. What can you do right now to keep growing despite where the military sends you or whether it takes your spouse away? Creativity is crucial, knowing your purpose will help provide the hope as your place, the people, and seasons change. Secret: Our calling is rarely tied to things like your business, your crafts, or your ideas. The most fulfilling calling will always involve people who need the lifegiving hope our wisdom carries. Here is a short talk from Brene Brown on understanding the power of empathy. A Lifegiver must be able to protect her calling. Protection involves both offense and defense. You must first be able to know how to take care of yourself. Each of you likely know what state you are in and what you are “needing to do” or being asked to do to take care of yourself- so do something today that moves you in that direction- at least one thing. But a Lifegiver must also work in Defense. Once you know your calling, it is much easier to say no to the energy wasters be it tasks or people that suck the life out of you. Knowing your calling gives you the words you need to say no to other things. My challenge to you is to make a mission statement if you haven’t already. A Lifegiver must give her marriage and family her first fruits. As much as I hate hearing the phrase often used by the military to “put your household in order”, there is much truth in that no person can be mission ready if those she is responsible for are neglected, in conflict, or in trouble. The place where you have the most impact and influence is at home. Think of it this way. What you may have to offer someone else, multiplies when you invest in it at home. What someone else might walk away saying, “Gee that was nice of her” gets a “That was exactly what I needed in my life today” from our husband or children. Our calling is something that is a life journey, we will often need to take sabbaticals to give our first fruits to those that mean the most to us. This does not mean you lose your calling, but if you don’t take care of your first responsibility, you CAN lose your family. Bring life to the garden in your own backyard before starting a greenhouse business. Here is a great TedTalk by Benjamin Zander on how to define whether you know you are making a difference. He is a Classical Musician and uses music to make an incredible point.
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Bonus- Depression & the Bible
This is not a new podcast, but a talk I gave in 2010 to New Life Church, Colorado Springs, CO. Many people have requested access to it, so it has been included into the Lifegiver Series. Here I address how you can manage chronic depression as well as how your faith and relationship with God plays a role in our mood. Depression looks very different for each person it effects. From a bad day, to Postpartum, to grief, and Chronic Depression- there are so many kinds and levels. There can be hope, though. And God does not intend for us to walk that road alone. This talk is full of scripture and doesn’t discourage the use of medication either. I hope it will bring hope to those who struggle with it personally as well as the caretakers of family members who fight it everyday.
